Like many foster parents, Brian and Jarrod Cruz-Stipsits planned to adopt a young child. They’d heard myths, as they described them, that teens could come with baggage and bad habits that would be difficult to shake.
So when their caseworker called suggesting they consider Logan, a 13-year-old boy who had been in foster care for much of his life, Brian and Jarrod were leery. They chose to remain open to the idea and reached out to their network of foster care families to ask for advice. As it turned out, a friend had fostered Logan and encouraged them to give the teen a chance.
“(He) told us that Logan was a good kid who would greatly benefit from the kind of stable, loving environment that he knew we would provide. And he reminded us that what you read about a child in their case file does not necessarily match reality,” Brian said.
Brian and Jarrod took their friend’s advice, and in April 2020, Logan moved into their Hernando Beach home. As it was the peak of the COVID pandemic, everyone was masked, and Florida’s schools were closed. So, for the first six months, Brian and Jarrod home-schooled Logan, transitioning rapidly from a childless couple to full-time parents and teachers!
“One of my anxieties about adopting a teen was that I wouldn’t be able to help them with math and science and other subjects that are being taught differently today than they were when I was in school. But luckily, that didn’t turn out to be a problem,” Brian said.
Brian and Jarrod helped Logan get on track in school and introduced him to sports that were new to him, like basketball. “It was our (gym class),” Brian said. “We bonded while playing after school every day. Logan loved it, and we did, too.”
They also introduced Logan to their extended families—parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins—who embraced him.
“The more I got to know Brian, Jarrod, and their families, the more it felt natural, like this was where I belonged,” Logan said. “I’d never had this kind of structure and stability before.”
Choosing a name as a tribute to Nana
By January 2021, Brian, Jarrod, and Logan had agreed to move forward with adoption, which they hoped to complete on or before Logan’s birthday. At the same time, Brian’s mother was battling terminal cancer. She would die before the adoption was finalized.
“As he prepared to join our family, Logan had a lot of decisions to make, including choosing his legal name,” said Brian. “He decided to take my mother’s middle name, Rae, which he spells Ray, as his middle name to honor her. Six months later she passed away. It was a beautiful tribute to Nana.”
On March 11, 2021, Brian and Jarrod adopted Logan. It was his 14th birthday.
Becoming a family of advocates
These days, no member of the Cruz-Stipsits household keeps secret their experience and enthusiasm for foster care from adoption and the need for families for teens. Together this year, Brian and Logan joined the AdoptUSKids Speakers Bureau, which prepares them to speak with members of the media and at public events.
On his own, Logan is an active volunteer with Florida Youth Shine, an organization that advocates for the rights of children in foster care in the state. In the last three years, he has spoken to state legislators and advocated for two bills and legislation proposed in the Florida Congress, including one mandating that guardians and foster parents talk with children about the benefits they are entitled to at age-appropriate times.
“My parents have encouraged me to grow as a student, a person, and a leader,” Logan said. “Now I want to show other teens in foster care that they are extraordinary people who can achieve their dreams.”
Brian and Jarrod have gone from skeptics to enthusiastic supporters of teenage adoption.
“When we were in class, very few people wanted to adopt teens,” said Brian. “Over the last few years, we’ve become big proponents. Teens obviously need love. And, we’ve come to believe, teens are mature enough to see the value of being adopted in a way that a younger child might not. And that can make the bond even richer.”
